Breaking The Glass
One of the most widely discussed topics today, and for the last 100 years, has been women’s empowerment — and the debate on equity vs equality. I recently made the transition from a liberal all-girls’ environment in school, to the heavily male-dominated world of STEM. I know that my transition is far from complete, and will be subjected to even more scrutiny, the further I go in my career. This article is an entry in my journal as a young woman just starting her 20s, taking my first steps away from the shelter of home.
The glass ceiling is frustrating because it gives you a clear view of everything that is out of your reach.
It is called a glass ceiling, simply because it is invisible. But invisible does not mean it ceases to exist — rather, it is an imposter that only pretends to do so. To the privileged, the equation is simple — work hard and earn your merits.
“Equality for all” — but equality cannot be afforded by all.
“A fixed cutoff ” — but not a fixed starting point.
The privilege to say “seeing is believing”. And what is invisible cannot be seen.
The glass ceiling has become more and more subtle these days. At some point, the glass ceiling was having your own work published under some other man’s name. It was being told that your place belongs in the kitchen. That your brain is not “wired” for scientific discourse. You are not biologically capable of carrying out physically demanding tasks. You are too emotional to be taken seriously at work. You are the cause of distraction in the workplace and your existence compromises on our efficiency.
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But saying these things today would at worst make you lose your job, and at best get you a dressing down from the HR (not that it stops everyone from saying it anyway). Besides, in the 21st Century, we are all sensible, sensitive, understanding folk, aren’t we? Homophobia, racism, sexism… these are so 1960s. We, as a human race, have obviously evolved past such immature behaviour.
… So does this mean we have broken the glass ceiling? Nope. It too, has evolved. Let me introduce you to the modern-day new glass ceiling.
Built with the new state-of-the-art infrastructure, this one is almost undetectable! Today’s glass ceiling is when you land a desk job and trigger gossip amongst your peers because you are an undeserving candidate and the company is simply trying to fulfill their diversity quota. It is having your achievements and accomplishments casually invalidated and written off as just a consolation prize — hired out of pity. It is when your promotion (only after your male peers have already received theirs) gives your peers the undeniable right to comment on your character and make assumptions on how you got it. It is when the paternity leave for men is often accompanied by loss of stature in their workplace. It is how “paternity premium” is translated to “motherhood penalty”. It is how you miss important opportunities because your boss thought you were not fit for the job since you will need to become the sole caretaker of your hypothetical future family soon (because it is only natural for you to start one of your own). It is how the wage gap today is justified by all of the reasons mentioned above.
Most importantly, it is aspiring for the top, only to realize how devoid of women it is.
Seeing is believing. And unless more women are seen in positions of power or responsibility, it is difficult for us to believe that it can even be achieved.
Empowered women empower women
Representation allows people to refer to successful figures who look like them, come from the same background as them, and have faced the same trials and tribulations as them on their way to the top.
Recently, I received the opportunity to attend one of Google’s renowned #IAmRemarkable sessions. To give a brief overview of this session — it is an initiative to empower women and other underrepresented communities and allow them to overcome the social barriers which have constantly held them back so far.
Self-marketing is one of the most essential skills in the world. Often, we might have encountered real-life examples of someone who has accomplished unimaginable feats, yet, by virtue (or vice?) of staying absolutely silent about it, no one noticed them. On the other hand, you might have also seen someone gain recognition without doing anything extraordinary — except of course, for the extraordinary feat of selling themselves properly.
The older we grow, the more we realize the importance of self-marketing. It is present in everything from building your resume to making an elevator pitch. If you downplay your skills, no one would know your true records. But more importantly, very few people will actually make the effort to uncover what you’re hiding. Marketing yourself is one of your responsibilities, and by not carrying out this responsibility, you leave plenty of room for it to be interpreted as not doing your work properly. Confidence is a skill people respect, and lack of it does not go down very well in the professional world.
Our social structure has made it convenient for underrepresented sections to feel unnecessary, or inadequate. We stay quiet because we feel like our achievements are nothing worth mentioning — surely other people can achieve all of this before they’ve even made their breakfast. This is usually a sign of imposter syndrome, where you are convinced that you, an absolute incompetent, are a competent enough imposter to somehow hoodwink the geniuses around you into believing that you are leading a superior life than reality.
Or, fear that by mentioning your success, you’re setting yourself up for failure, and that “pride comes before the fall” (a thought process that leans slightly towards superstition). So we try to be “humble” and end up silencing ourselves instead.
The third reasoning is what my instructor has described to me as ‘anticipatory bail’. You predict your failure, and try to come up with justifications for it before it has even happened. Because you are convinced that there is little to no chance of succeeding.
All of these are connected to the subconscious conviction that for whatever reason, you are not suited for your role — even if the evidence suggests otherwise.
My favourite quote from the #IAmRemarkable session is
“It’s not bragging if it’s based on facts”
Even after hearing this, it takes some time to get used to it. “Is it even relevant?” is a question I’ve asked myself. “What if people find me arrogant?” is another.
But, I am also someone who has been on the receiving end. I know for a fact that when someone told me about their achievements, the last thing on my mind was “This person is so full of themselves”, and I mainly thought “This is incredible, I should try to learn from them”. Keeping this in mind, it made it much easier for me to be absolutely open and frank about what I’ve achieved.
I believe that by being overly humble, you are only disabling yourself from achieving more. People achieve what they think they deserve. If you genuinely feel like you’re not good enough to do something, you will most likely never even try to do it. And trying is the obvious predecessor to success.
The point of this article was not to highlight that underrepresented sections (women, in particular, being one myself) are the only people who face imposter syndrome, or resort to seeking anticipatory bail. Nor do I intend to imply that all women face all of what I have just described. However, I want to bring attention to the fact that often, such mentality is either directly, or indirectly, connected to society and how it treats or has treated people.
Even after knowing all of this, I still struggle with my lack of confidence today. I struggle to get over it. But every time I realize I’ve taken the initiative to do something I probably never would have even thought of a year ago, it makes that struggle worth it.
A younger version of me would have felt embarrassed at being called a diversity hire. I would have believed these people when they tried to reduce the impact of my efforts.
But I’m glad I’m a diversity hire — it means my existence makes a direct and positive impact on the gender ratio in the industry. It means I contribute to creating a healthier work environment. It means I ensure more perspectives are considered, more voices are heard, more people get the platform they deserve. It means that I am a very valuable member of the team, and I definitely do belong.
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